


It's Not Easy to be Me

by DAgron01



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-05
Updated: 2016-12-05
Packaged: 2018-09-06 18:50:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8764852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DAgron01/pseuds/DAgron01
Summary: Lena and Kara are at a loss and feeling quite broken after the take down of Cadmus leader, Lillian Luthor. Lena is left feeling the loneliness of being the last remaining Luthor, while not even actually being a Luthor at all. Kara understands that kind of pain more than anyone, but she is unable to help her friend as Kara and is forced to do so as Supergirl. Can the two women learn that they aren't as alone as they think they are as long as they have each other? They certainly won't be able to do so without some help.Drama, angst and some humor.





	

Note: This follows canon, including the crossover event. It is what happens directly after not only the Medusa virus arc on Supergirl but the events (in brief mention throughout) of the crossover.

 

Prologue  
After making sure that both Hank and Mon-El were okay (and learning that the virus was actually rendered inert before it had been used in the missile and launched over National City), Kara fly to L-Corp to check on Lena. Of course, the brunette was there alone; drinking wine and looking more morose than Kara’s ever seen her.  
She gracefully landed on the balancy and swiftly walked through the mostly ajar door.  
“I know that you said this wasn’t actually the entrance, and after you quickly dismissed me last time I was here...I doubt you want to see me at all, but I just wanted to say…”  
Kara got most of her words out as she walked further into the office and startled Lena, but the woman recovered enough to interrupt the superheroes rambling.  
“I’m sorry.”  
The simple words conveyed emotions that seemed far from simplistic, which gave the blonde pause.  
Kara furrowed her brows in confusion before walking closer to her friend (where they still friends after tonight? Did Lena ever consider Supergirl her friend?) and reached out her hand in comfort before thinking better of it and letting it drop to her side awkwardly.  
“I don’t understand. You saved all of the aliens in National City and you stopped your mom. Which was something me and the DEO hadn’t been able to do with our vast resources and two of the most powerful aliens in the galaxy.” She shook her head as if regrettably. “You had your mom arrested. Even if I overlooked that you actually saved us all, what you did…”  
Lena looked about to argue but thought better of it. She let her eyes drift to the floor in thought instead, she didn’t feel like the hero that Supergirl seemed to want to make her out to be.  
Kara didn’t know how to approach the anguished girl, so instead of blabbering away, she walked outside and hoped the other girl would follow her.  
At first, Lena assumed that Supergirl had been about to hurry on some other assumed life saving mission, but when she saw the hero rest her forearms on the ledge of the balcony and gaze unhurriedly across the city, she took a deep breath and joined the woman on the balcony.  
They stood in silence for another moment or so, before Lena gathered the courage or perhaps the bravado to speak.  
“I was apologizing because I made you doubt me.”  
Kara turned quickly to face her friend, but Lena wasn’t looking at her. “I believe in you, Lena. Remember that whole speech I gave you about being your own hero and that you are better than who your family happens to be?”  
Lena shook her head. “Maybe you had faith in me, or in who you thought I could be.” She raised her hand to silence Kara’s retort. “But I also saw your face on the pier, when I turned the key. You looked betrayed and...you can’t deny that you worried that I had chosen my mother’s side.”  
Kara turned away from Lena and resumed her previous position resting against the ledge as as looked at the city she admired.  
“I didn’t understand what I was seeing. And a part of me was...hurt, because I thought that we understood each other...I thought…” She was silent for a moment as she gathered her words. “I’m not like Superman. He came to Earth as a baby, and has no memories of Krypton. He didn’t lose what I’ve lost. My entire family, all my friends...my home. Everything I knew was destroyed. And when I came here, I thought at least I had a purpose. I was supposed to find my baby cousin Kal-El and protect him. But...everything went wrong and I got here after he was already grown up and already this perfect superhero who didn’t need me to protect him. He had his own Earth family and I had no one, not even my cousin. Not really. And even when I became a superhero in my own right...I was still compared to him. I would save people and see the disappointment of their faces, that it was me and not him. And I made stupid mistakes and I am actually pretty horrible at keeping my identity secret. Like really bad.” She let out a puff of air and chanced a glance at Lena, whose face betrayed nothing. “I can’t seem to do anything right. Most of the time, but sometimes, sometimes it’s really good. And I have friends now, real ones. And I...acquired a fantastic family. But then, just recently...I told you that I found out my parents weren’t who I thought they were. My dad, on Krypton, he’s the one who actually made the virus. And I...it really wrecked me. Like...I thought they were....I used them as my inspiration, my moral compass as who I wanted to be as a hero. The kind of legacy I wanted to be known for and….”  
Kara jumped and squeaked out in surprise, when she felt Lena’s cold hand on one of hers. She looked down at their hands and then into the eyes of the girl next to her.  
“And when you thought that I also wasn’t who you thought I was…” Lena finished and shook her head with regret. “I never wanted to be the person to let you down.” She pulled her hand away and brushed both hands roughly on her skirt. “I know what it’s like to be let down by someone you hold in such high regard.”  
“I’m sorry again, that I had to not only be the one to break the news to you about your mom, but also that I was right about her. I wish I didn’t have to be.”  
Lena released a humorless chuckle. “My mother was certainly not anyone I held in high regard. I couldn’t stand her on her best day.”  
Although Kara was confused, she didn’t prod any further. Instead, she nodded thoughtfully. “For what it’s worth, Lena, the reason that your assumed betrayal hurt so much is because I did think so highly of you. I still do. I wish you would have trusted me enough to let me know what you had planned, but I think I understand why you didn’t.”  
“I don’t think you do Supergirl, honestly.” She exhaled loudly and then steeled her features into a look of pure determination. “Yes, I knew that I had the best chance of bringing her down if I appeared to go along with her...but also, I didn’t want to have you involved with that process at all. Because, I didn’t want to have Supergirl associated in a power struggle with the Luthors the way that Superman will forever be. You don’t want to live in his shadow any more than I want to live in the Luthor's. I thought maybe this way, we could both move on.”  
Kara smiled softly and took a step toward the brunette. This time, she didn’t overthink it, she just raised her arms and pulled Lena into a tight hug.  
“That might be one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me.”  
Lena gave her a watery chuckle that Supergirl pointedly ignored. No need to bring up the fact that Lena was just as emotional as she was right now.  
“You mean, you don’t have all of your friends turning on their families to protect you?”  
It wasn’t supposed to bring up a bad memory, it was only meant as a joke. But Kara’s mind wandered to the not so distance past. She stepped away from Lena, and looked directly at her. “Actually, the closest person in my life saved me by killing the only family I had left, besides Superman.”  
Lena’s eyes widened.  
“In her defense, she seemed like she was about to actually kill me...families are complicated, aren’t they?”  
Lena gave her a genuine smile, albeit a small one. “Isn’t that an understatement.”  
They stood in silence for another moment or so, awkwardly avoiding eye contact, before Supergirl took another few steps away and turned back towards the city. “I should get going. I wanted to check to make sure that you were okay, and say ‘thank you.’ Whether you want to admit it or not, doing the right thing still hurts when you have to make choices like the one you did tonight.”  
“It wasn’t as hard a choice as you think.”  
She gave up her only remaining family and was basically now alone in the world, just like Supergirl had been when she just arrived on Earth. So no matter the brave face Lena appeared to be putting on, Kara knew that she either was lying to herself completely or it hadn’t sunk in yet. Either way, Kara would make sure to be there for her friend in any capacity that she could be.  
“Regardless, from the bottom of my heart...thank you.”  
Lena could see no trace of hurt or regret on Supergirl’s face. If she were being really honest with herself, the look on Supergirl’s face when she turned the key and released the missile was the hardest thing she dealt with all day. And that was saying a lot, because she did turn on her own mother and had her sent to jail. Apparently, being the hero wasn’t all it was cracked up to be if you didn’t have people on your side to praise your efforts when you actually did the right thing. She had been drinking the sorrows away; thinking that not only had she lost faith in Kara, but also ended up losing the trust of Supergirl and those things coupled with betraying her own mother were enough to nearly ruin her. Until Supergirl breezed through her office and made her believe in herself again.  
“You’re welcome. And thank you Supergirl, for believing in me when everything about my name screamed that you shouldn’t.”  
“We make our own destiny, Lena. And yours isn’t done being written.”  
They smiled sadly at each other, then Supergirl said a quick “see you soon” and flew off into the darkness.

 

 

SSSSSSSS

 

As if her week hadn’t been crazy and exhausting enough, she had been surprised by Barry (The Flash) and whisked away to another Earth. How cool is that, by the way?! She fought aliens and met Green Arrow and White Canary and so many awesome people. A whole team of superheroes and she had been a part of it. Her. Not Superman. Barry needed someone to help them defend their Earth and he not only thought of her, but went to another dimension to get her. She couldn’t explain to anyone how it felt to finally be chosen. To be good enough. Granted, at first Oliver (Green Arrow) had treated her like a pariah and that felt...well, she had sort of been used to getting the brush off by now...but it still stung. Okay, actually it hurt like hell. But at least the rest of them were impressed by her. Some more than others. Sara (White Canary) and Thea (Speedy, although why was she called Speedy and not just Red Arrow?) were more than friendly enough to make up for Oliver’s coolness.  
She almost didn’t want to leave them all behind. She felt more like herself than she had in a long time. Until she thought about Alex and Clark and Lois and J’onn and Eliza and James and Winn and Lucy and Lena and even Mon-El. The more she thought about it, the more people she realized she had in her corner. She wasn’t as alone in the universe as she sometime thought she was. And then Cisco gave her a device where she could easy travel through the dimensions and visit her new friends. As she teleported through the wormhole into her own apartment she admitted to herself that she was actually happy. That things were nearly perfect. The only thing that perhaps may have kept things from perfection, was Lena Luthor. She owed her an apology of her own. Not as Supergirl, but as Kara. And since she hadn’t yet checked on her as Kara, she didn’t know how the other woman was doing now that time had passed.  
Did time pass? She was on Earth-1 for nearly a week, did that mean that she was gone from her Earth that long? Oh, Rao! Alex is going to kill her!  
She wasted no time at all in flying to her sister’s apartment. She barreled through the open window and came face to face with Alex and Maggie, kissing.  
Woah, I guess time did pass here. Unless, she really hoped that Barry’s whole Flashpoint thing didn’t somehow affect her world as well. Did other things change that she isn’t aware of? Oh no, is Lena going to be evil now?  
“Supergirl? Relax, you look like your head's about to explode and you just fried my end table with your heat vision...so…” Alex’s soothing, yet admittedly concerned, voice broke through Kara’s heavily clouded mind.  
She closed her eyes tight and took a deep breath. When she released the air slowly from her lungs, she opened one eye warily...then the other. “Sorry…”  
Maggie slowly approached her with a glass and Kara took it and downed it quickly, thinking it was water. It was not. After recovering after a choking spell, she looked at the officer.  
Maggie shrugged. “I thought you might need a drink, and well, water doesn’t solve nearly as many problems as vodka does.”  
Kara narrowed her eyes at the woman. “I think the opposite is usually true, actually.”  
Maggie shrugged again. “To each their own, I guess.”  
“Kara, what’s wrong?” Alex asked full of worry, then her eyes widened as she quickly looked at Maggie.  
Maggie rolled her eyes and smirked. “I’m a detective. How bad would I be at my job if I didn’t figure out that your sister is Supergirl.”  
“Am I really that horrible at being subtle?”  
“Yes, actually.” Maggie said before she saw the distraught look on Kara’s face. “Kidding. I mean, the glasses aren’t really the best disguise...you know. And you don’t use a voice modulator like Batman or any of those guys do.”  
Alex elbowed the other woman to get her to shut up and thankfully, she got the hint. She took the half empty glass from Kara, downed it and excused herself to go get another drink. She didn’t lie when she said that alcohol helps with some of her problems.  
“Kara...what’s going on?”  
“I just spent a week on another Earth in a different dimension where I fought against bad aliens while on a team of superheroes.”  
“You...what?”  
Kara spoke quickly and explained everything that happened since she left Alex and the DEO. Apparently, the time she was on Earth-1 did not at all affect any of the time here. Alex confirmed that she finished at the DEO, when home and then Maggie came over and they had a nice talk which lead to a big confession which led to the kissing that she apparently walked in on.  
“I’ve worked with aliens pretty much my entire life, so you’d think that there wouldn’t be much that could actually surprise me.” Alex breathed out in complete awe after Kara was finished recounting her adventures.  
“I know, right.”  
“An actual time traveling spaceship. A guy who can run faster than you…”  
“That is open for debate actually.” Kara interrupted with a scowl.  
“An ex-assassin turned time traveling superhero.”  
“Who’s bisexual. I think you’d like her.” Kara said with a smirk when she saw Maggie standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room.  
“You’re not funny. At all.” Maggie said before she grunted and walked in the room to join them, and then added honesty, “But it does all sound pretty badass.”  
“It all sounds pretty unbelievable. Especially a guy with a bow. I mean, who takes a bow to an epic fight against brain-controlling aliens?” Alex admitted with amusement.  
“I kind of did wonder about that. But he and Thea did hold their own. They, and John Diggle remind me of you...sort of. They are human in a world full of super-powered beings, and they still fight the good fight. Not only that, but they definitely...like you, earned the respect and reputation they have for defending their Earth against people who should have easily defeated them.”  
“Hey!”  
“It was a compliment.” Kara frowned. “At least, it was supposed to be.”  
Maggie chuckled and shook her head. “I’m just now realizing that your social awkwardness isn’t really an act. I always figured that you and Clark Kent just pretended to be dorks to try to throw everyone off your trail.”  
“I’m not even going to dignify that with an answer.” Kara pouted.  
“Clark’s awkwardness is an act. Kara is well…” She smiled at her sister with complete adoration. “Kara is just Kara. Both with the cape and without it.”  
Maggie seemed to understand. “You know, I never really preferred Superman to Batman before because, I mean...he’s Batman and I’m from Gotham so…” She smiled fondly at Kara. “But I get it now. Batman is who he pretends to be. He’s shrouded in darkness, and stays in the shadows. He’s Gotham’s hero because someone like you or Superman couldn’t exist there, you are too good and wholesome that you’d be eaten alive.”  
“And that’s supposed to be a compliment, I assume.” Kara replied with sarcasm.  
“If you’d actually let me finish.” Maggie smirked. “Superman is Superman and he just pretends to be Clark. That’s how he is able to live a somewhat normal life and not let all the craziness consume him.”  
“And me?”  
Alex understood what Maggie was trying to say. She gently touched Kara’s cheek with her hand and held her gaze as she spoke. “Your more special than both of them, Kara. You aren’t one and pretending to be another. You’re both. They are both a part of you and you need both to be complete. Because you are a good person and you believe in people and you inspire hope. Sure, you are able to do that more visibly when you are Supergirl. But you changed just as many lives as Kara. Mine. Clark’s, Cat’s. Winn’s, Lena’s. In or out of that suit, Kara, you are a hero.”  
Maybe it was the events of the past week, or the maybe it was just the fact that she knew that Alex really did “see” her (and apparently, so did Maggie), but her eyes filled with tears and she didn’t have the strength or the desire to try to hold them in.  
She sighed deeply as Alex wiped some of the stray tears away with the hand already on her cheek.  
When Kara recovered enough to speak again, she said, “Speaking of Lena, I think Kara owes her an apology for attempting to leverage her friendship for a story. Even if the story was just made up, because she doesn’t know that.”  
“I think I owe her an apology as well, since I assumed the worst in her and she ended up doing something that none of us could have done.” Alex admitted.  
“It must suck though, having to send her own mother to prison.” Maggie stated.  
“Adopted mother.”  
“That’s worse, though. Isn’t it?” Maggie asked. “I mean, her own parents didn’t want anything at all to do with her. Then when she finally gets adopted by a family, it’s the Luthors.”  
Kara’s shoulders sagged in defeat. She can’t believe she didn’t realize that part of it all. Alex noticed the change in Kara’s demeanor and pulled her in for a one-armed hug.  
“Guess you’re grateful you found us, instead of a family that would have exploited and hurt you.”  
Kara let her head fall on her sister’s shoulder. “I’m glad I found you regardless. I honestly don’t know who I’d have been without you, Alex.”  
Alex swallowed thickly as a lump formed in her throat. “As I said before, you are a hero, Kara. You were destined to be, with or without me.”  
Kara hugged Alex tightly. “In that case, I’m glad it was with you.”  
“Me too.”  
A smirk settled across Kara’s face. “Enough about me. Now tell me, who made the first move this time?”  
Both Alex and Maggie blushed, but they were more than willing to tell their story.

 

Sssssssssss

 

The first thing the next morning, Kara hurried to L-Corp. She hoped that Lena was in better spirits today then she had been last night. However, it didn’t appear that when because when she got there, Jess actually stopped her at the front desk rather than letting her go up to Lena’s office directly.  
“You know as well as I do that Miss Luthor gave me permission to go up whenever I wanted.” Kara said sweetly but firmly.  
Jess shook her head sadly. “I remember, and I would be inclined to let you but she specifically said that she wasn’t to be disturbed.”  
“I’m sure she is busy, what with everything that happened yesterday.” Kara nodded with understanding. “Could you at least ask her if she would have time to meet me for lunch later?”  
Jess’s eyes dropped to the ground and she mumbled something that Kara, even with her super hearing, couldn’t understand.  
“What was that?” She asked softly.  
Jess looked up at her with sadness in her eyes. “She specifically said that you were not to interrupt her.”  
“Me? She said my name specifically?”  
Jess nodded.  
Kara sighed loudly and remorse covered her features. “Will you at least….is she okay?”  
Jess regarded her with wide eyes and a look of incredulity.  
“Right, stupid question. How can she be okay, after last night.”  
Jess looked at Kara for a minute before she sighed and shook her head. “She ‘s happier with you around. I’m not the only one who notices it. I think that if there is any chance that she gets through it, that you will help her.”  
“I’d do anything.” Kara admitted honestly.  
“I know. That’s why I am risking the fact that she might follow through on her threat and fire me...and I’m going to pretend like I didn’t see you walk by me. Okay?”  
Kara wanted to be excited by the fact that she was being given a free pass, but she was concerned for Jess’s career. “She really threatened to fire you?”  
Jess nodded.  
“I won’t let that happen okay. I’ll make sure she knows you had nothing to do with it.”  
Jess smiled and made a show of walking away from the desk, which Kara took as her cue to walk toward Lena’s office.  
She decided against knocking and just decided to walk right in.  
“I said that I’m not to be interrupted…” Lena spoke without looking up from her desk but when she did, the rest of her words got caught in her throat.  
“I didn’t see Jess on my way up and since you had previously extended an open invitation to enter, I thought I’d take advantage of it.”  
“It seems like you’ve decided to take advantage of our friendship a lot lately.” Lena bit out with scorn. “And just so we’re clear, that open invitation has been revoked.”  
Kara hurried over to her friend, but was careful to keep a respectful distance. “I came to check on you after the events of last night. My sister, I mean...she didn’t tell me the specifics because it’s...you know….classified and...stuff.” Kara hated how she was always flustered when talking to Lena, and today not only was she nervous as usual, but she was also very worried about her friend’s welfare. “I know what you did to save the city. To save all the aliens.”  
“And what? You came for the exclusive. You have to know that I’ve turned down every interview. I will not be made a spectacle of. Nor will I be made into some over-glorified hero that they will eventually want to try and tear down.”  
Sadness flashed across Kara’s face, and Lena nearly crumpled at the sight of it. Sure, she hated that Kara used her, that she probably faked their friendship entirely, but she certainly didn’t want the girl to then take pity on her. She may only be a Luthor in name, but she did still have her pride.  
“I didn’t come for a story, Lena.” Kara slowly and deliberately took a seat across Lena, who still sat at her desk. The physical barrier between them made the metaphorical distance between them glaringly obvious.  
“And I’m to belief that? Take your word for it?”  
“I came in yesterday...to...there was never a story. And I would never have written a story pitting you against your mom, I would hope that you knew you meant more to me than that.”  
Lena’s hardened expression fell only briefly. “Until yesterday, I did think that.”  
“I let you down, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I didn’t just come to you with what I found...but…”  
“But what?”  
“I knew that you had nothing to do with anything that your mother had been suspected to be a part of. And I didn’t suspect your mother, just because she was a Luthor. I just...there was stuff that was happening and I had people I cared about that were in danger and…”  
“And you cared more about protecting them than you did about preserving the friendship you had with me.”  
“No. You keep putting words in my mouth.” Kara spit out with a bit more malice than she ever intended, especially when it was directed at the woman in front of her. “I admire you so much, Lena. I value our friendship. I actually really enjoy spending time with you and I should stop using work as an excuse, because in full disclosure...I sometimes pretend to have stories just as an excuse to talk to you.”  
Lena’s mouth opened slightly in shock, but she remained quiet.  
“I have a lot of people in my life. I am lucky to be surrounded by some pretty amazing people. But sometimes, even among my friends...I still feel alone. Not as much as I used to, but it’s still there. Sometimes. And maybe that comes from having been adopted. Because my family isn’t my family, not really.” She made sure to look directly in Lena’s eyes. “But sometimes...the family that you choose or that chooses you...sometimes it’s better than the family you got stuck with. And...I don’t know. I always saw us as kindred spirits. In a way. I know it’s stupid. And I know I ruined everything. And I understand that I broke your trust and that you have every right to hate me. But even if you never forgive me, I need you to know that I never pretended to be your friend just for a story and I never meant to use you. I need you to know that.”  
Lena was silent for a long time and Kara was getting fidgety. Before she could be yelled at or told to never come back or to go to Hell or whatever else she absolutely deserved to hear from the other girl, she stood to leave.  
“I just wanted to say that. And to see if you were okay. And to let you know that I would listen if you ever wanted to talk, and the promise you that if you did want to talk...about anything, that of course it would be off the record. I just want you to be okay, and will do whatever I can to help you get there.”  
Lena studied her carefully, then she stood from her seat and walked around the desk toward Kara. “If you’re serious about that.”  
“I am!” Kara interrupted.  
“Then the best thing you can do to help me feel better, is to stay away from me.” Lena said then turned her back on her and walked out toward the door that lead to the balcony. “I trust that you’ll let yourself out.”  
Kara hurried out of the room before without looking back. Lena heard the door close and released a shuddering breath. Betraying Lillian Luthor was easy compared to sending Kara Danvers away. She waited until she could no longer tolerate it, because sobs wracked her body and she fell to the floor in a broken heap.  
It hurt to have the one person that brought light into her dark world be the person that snuffed out everything good and decent and pure and thrust her into complete darkness. It hurt, because she wanted nothing more than to let Kara back in because she truly did believe what she had said. But she wasn’t sure she’d be strong enough to withstand if she were let down by the girl all over again. She knew it was wrong and completely unfair to put so many unattainable expectations onto the poor girl. She was only human and people make mistakes. She’s living proof of that. She wished she had the capacity to forgive that Supergirl did. She wished that she didn’t rely on one person so much, but Kara had been the first person to see past her family name and to see the girl inside. Even if that girl was just as flawed as the Luthors were (okay, maybe not exactly as flawed because who could be?). Kara was pure optimism and hope and bubbly and adorable and everything that she wasn’t. And yet, even now, Kara looked at her like she saw all the possibilities; all the potential that Lena could have. Maybe not now. Now, she probably hated her.  
When that thought entered Lena’s mind, she sobbed even harder. She didn’t want to be let down by the other woman again, but more than that...she realized that she hated that she was the one that let Kara down. It was almost worse than when she thought she had let down Supergirl. Why did she always screw up everything good in her life? Maybe she really was a Luthor after all.  
“I promise that I’m not spying on you and that I didn’t intend to eavesdrop, but…” Supergirl floated down and landed on the ledge above Lena. “I was just passing by and heard you…” She lowered her voice to a soothing tone and jumped off the ledge and onto the balcony so that she was standing in front of Lena. “I hate hearing people cry, especially my friends. Not that crying isn’t good for the soul, because when I watch movies I cry like a baby and not even at overly dramatic movies...but at really embarrassing ones. Like, have you ever seen Star Wars? Or Twilight? Or even sometimes I cry in comedies, but that’s just because I wish I had a life like that and….”  
She snapped her mouth abruptly and cursed herself in Kryptonian. The combination of that and her rambling actually made Lena laugh through her tears. Supergirl knelt beside the other girl and wrapped her up in her strong arms and rocked them gently back and forth.  
“My point is, cry it out. I’ve got time. And when you are ready to talk, I’ll listen. Until then, you’re stuck with listening to me.”  
Lena burrowed further into her and let the girl’s presence wash over her. “I don’t think it’s that bad, actually. I’ve been stuck with worse.”  
“That’s not exactly a compliment.” Supergirl teased. “But I’ll take what I can get, from a Luthor.”  
Lena laughed and sobbed again, and Kara just held her even tighter. “And my….friend’s girlfriend said I wasn’t funny.”  
Kara let Lena cry until she appeared to be all cried out, then when she had yet to say anything, she decided she’d fill in the silence.  
“So, I don’t know if you’re aware but since you're like all your science-y stuff just like Alex, you might appreciate this. There are multiple Earths.”  
“What?”  
“I was just as lost when my friend, The Flash, came to visit last year and announced that he was from a different dimension or whatever. Parallel universes is how he describes it. Anyway, last night, after I left you, he found me and said he needed my help on his Earth to fight off evil aliens.”  
“Are you being serious right now or just trying to keep my mind off everything else?”  
“Both, actually.”  
“Multiple Earths?”  
“We’re on Earth-3. According to them. Anyway, I joined a superhero group of awesome...superheroes. We really should have come up with a team name. Maybe I’ll suggest that for next time.”  
“Who was on the team?”  
“Green Arrow. Who was kind of intense, but when I learned all that he went through, it made sense.”  
“What was his superpower?”  
“Oh, he’s human. He has a bow and…”  
“Seriously? You’re not making this up?”  
“No. The Flash was well, he was fast. Faster than a speeding bullet.”  
“But not faster than you.”  
“Of course not.” Kara smiled proudly. “And Atom had a super powered flying suit that was kind of cool. And Firestorm has fire powers obviously and he could fly too. Or they. Anyway...Heat Wave who was a little disturbing and actually wouldn’t stop hitting on me.” She shuddered violently and smiled when Lena chuckled a little. “Spartan and Speedy were also both human, with no super powers.”  
“Speedy and the Flash, didn’t that get confusing?”  
Kara shook her head. “No Speedy wasn’t fast, she was Green Arrow’s sister except she wore red and had a red bow.”  
“I don’t get it.”  
“I didn’t ask. Oh! And White Canary was an ex-assassin but now she was part of a team that uses a time traveling spaceship. She also used to date Green Arrow, but then when she got trained by the League of Assassins she fell in love with their leader’s daughter and…”  
“A bi-sexual superhero from another Earth. Do you really expect me to believe any of this?”  
“I’m an alien from another planet, and one of my closest friends is a Martian from Mars. I fly, am bulletproof with super strength and super hearing. I have heat vision and x-ray vision and my breath can freeze things. Do you believe I am real?”  
“Sometimes I have trouble believing that there is so much good in one person.” She admitted then pulled away from Kara and looked at her with wide eyes. “With your super hearing and x-ray vision...are you ever tempting to you know...spy on people in an...intimate way?”  
“Are you asking if I’m secretly a pervert?” Kara asked incredulously.  
At the reproach in Supergirl’s voice, Lena shrunk down and looked awkwardly at her hands. “I guess not.”  
Kara laughed. “I’m not perfect you know. You don’t have to go looking for nefarious intentions. I make mistakes just like anyone else.”  
“Name one.”  
“On Earth-1 when we went to fight the aliens. He tried to save the president and walked right into a trap. The Dominators, that’s what we called the aliens. For you know, reasons. But they brainwashed those of us that were there and we started to attack our own teammates. I almost killed The Flash.”  
“But that wasn’t acrually you. You’re going to have to try better than that.”  
“When The Flash came to this Earth last year, he was going to help me stop some supervillains and I didn’t come up with a plan in advance, even though he said we should, and I led him into another trap that nearly got us both killed.”  
“I don’t buy it. I want something really juicy.”  
“Sometimes, I put too much faith in people and I have gotten burned a few times when they actually turned out to be supervillains. Or my Aunt when she tried to destroy all human life on Earth.”  
“I don’t think believing in people is a mistake. I’m glad you believed in me.”  
“Sometimes, I expect people to have the same morals as me. I expect too much out of too many people. And instead of seeing them for how they truly are, sometimes, I see them for how I want them to me or how I think they could be.”  
“Wanting humanity to live up to your expectations is noble, otherwise, what are you saving us all from if we don’t even try to save ourselves or better ourselves.”  
“But you were right when you said that I wear this suit and act all high and mighty, because really, who am I to say that my morals and ethics are the right ones? I’m wrong sometimes too. I disappoint people. I let people down. I can fight off aliens intent on killing innocent people, because I have the power to do that. But the real hero stuff, anyone can do that. You did that.”  
“I was wrong and upset and lashing out when I said that to you. Sure at the time, I may have thought I meant it, but...it isn’t true. You don’t act better than us or above us. You could. And I think that’s the part that Lex never understood. You and Superman have the powers of gods, and you could easily take over the world. People with less power than you have tried. But you not only save those who are below you, you try to life among them. You said you have friends. You work with humans, like Agent Danvers. Like me. You asked me for my help. You are modest and honest and so very real, Supergirl.”  
“I thought I was the one who was supposed to be making you feel better.”  
“But we’re friends, and it goes both ways.”  
“Friends.” Kara repeated with a sad smile. It nearly broke her heart that Lena was so openly accepting of her as Supergirl, but threw Kara Danvers out of her office and in no uncertain terms told her to never come back.  
“And thank you for your very colorful story, even if I’m not sure I believe it.”  
“You just complimented me about my honesty! Why would I lie about something like that. I couldn’t make it up if I tried, I don’t have a very good imagination.”  
Lena didn’t reply, instead she pushed away from Supergirl and started to stand up. Before she was able to thank the superhero for anything and everything, sirens were heard in the distance.  
“Looks like a job for Supergirl.” She said with a small and genuine smile.  
“I do have to go, but I will be around and if you do want to talk...about anything.”  
“You’ll be the first to know.”  
Kara gave her a satisfied nod, before flying off to stop a bank robbery across town.  
Sssssssssss

 

Lena was surprised when Agent Danvers came marching into her office one evening. It was a few days after her breakdown in front of Supergirl. Actually, since then, Kara Danvers had actually written a really great piece for Catco about the whole Medusa virus debacle. She even interviewed Supergirl, who mentioned Lena’s role making the virus inert but had been careful not to elaborate on her role in getting her own mother arrested. The piece itself was well written and unbiased and had someone only reported the facts of the case without completely villainizing Lillian Luthor. Lena really shouldn’t have been surprised, because she knew that Kara was a good writer and an even better person. But knowing that and then reading it in size 12 font right there in black and white for everyone in National City to see, were two completely different things.  
She actually fought against her own desire to call Kara and congratulate her on a job well done, and her expressed wishes toward Kara to leave her alone. She couldn’t demand that Kara stay away and then days later, call her up like everything was okay between them. Even if it was what a large part of her wanted to do. After all, Kara had thus far obeyed her wishes and stayed away.  
Which was why she was so shocked when Kara’s sister barged into her office.  
“Agent Danvers, I’d say that it was a pleasure to see you again but I’ve never been much for dishonesty.” She said with a false sweetness that the agent bristled at immediately.  
“I know we don’t know each other well, even though we each saved each other's life.”  
“I saved yours twice, but who's counting.” Lena smirked.  
“Now see, this is why I had a hard time believing Kara when she kept trying to defend you.” Alex retorted angrily as she crossed her arms in front of her. “I actually came here to apologize and I’m already thinking better of it.”  
Lena had nothing to say to that.  
“I do owe you an apology, but after the way my sister has been so miserable and sad because of you, I feel like I should also be here yelling at you for hurting my sister.”  
“Keep Kara out of this.”  
Alex rolled her eyes. “I wouldn’t be here at all if it wasn’t for her.”  
“I never asked you to be here. I don’t need an apology if it isn’t sincere.”  
Alex dropped her arms and took up a less guarded and intimidating stance. “It’s sincere.” She sighed. Without asking for permission, she sat in the chair across from Lena. “Kara...she...she’s the best person I know. I came out to her recently, and I was so scared. I didn’t want to let her down. I didn’t want it to change the way she looked at me. I didn’t want to lose the most important person in my life. And I told her. She was gentle and asked a bunch of questions and I didn’t want to talk about it anymore. I was scared and…”  
Her voice wavered in a way that made Lena feel a bit sorry for her, she no longer held any resentment toward the woman as she relaxed and listened to the rest of the agent’s confession.  
“Things were awkward between us for a bit and I immediately thought the worst. That she hated me. That I ruined things. I actually went to her apartment and was going to take it all back.”  
“Take it back how? Like stop being a lesbian?” Lena asked incredulously but without malice.  
“I would do whatever it took to get my sister back. So, yes. I’d have taken it back. Hidden it deep inside, even if it killed me. That’s how much I care about my sister. But when I went to confront her, I learned that I didn’t give Kara or myself enough credit.”  
“What happened?”  
“She avoided me because I said that I didn’t want to talk about it anymore and she thought she was giving me the space I requested. When she saw how scared I was so told me that she was more than okay with who I am and that she owed me an apology.”  
“For what?”  
“For creating an environment in which I felt that I couldn’t tell her who I was.”  
Lena’s intense gaze wavered a bit and she looked at her own trembling hands. She didn’t look back at Alex as the other woman continued speaking.  
“She thought she let me down because I had waited so long to come out, to admit who I truly was. And she actually hated herself for it. She could never hate me. Or anyone. But she has no trouble hating herself. She’s the best person I have ever known, and yet she somehow is the only one who doesn’t see how truly special she really is.”  
Lena’s breathing became labored, and Alex noticed but didn’t comment on it. Instead, she continued.  
“So when that girl told me that I could trust you, that you weren’t like the rest of the Luthors. She sees the best in everyone, it’s a curse as much as a blessing. But I wouldn’t change her for the world. I work for an organization that deals with the very worst in humanity. Alien or human. I am jaded at best. Kara learned that we wanted to tap your phones and invade your privacy, which in all honesty, I did behind Kara’s back anyway. Sorry about that as well, and since then, obviously, we stopped and will never spy on you like that again.”  
Lena’s eyes darkened slightly and anger was visible in her expression, but she didn’t say anything about it.  
“Kara was convinced that she could ask you want you knew and you’d be honest with her and then we could all move on to other leads.”  
Lena made tight fists with her hands until her knuckles were white. “I am trying my best not to lose control and have your violently thrown out of my office right now.”  
“I would deserve it if you did.” Alex admitted sadly. “Supergirl tried to convince me as well. She said that she knew you and that you would never be involved with something evil. I know that maybe after hearing from both of them that maybe I should have given you the benefit of the doubt, but then the missile went off and the toxin was released and…”  
“And you thought you were right about me.”  
Alex nodded. “I should know by now that people have a way of surprising you. Especially people like Kara and the people she chooses to surround herself with. That should have been enough for me.”  
“Apology accepted.” Lena said evenly.  
“And just so you know, Kara didn’t send me here. She doesn’t know I’m here, because she is true to her word and you wanted her to stay away. But you should also know, that she really cares about you and she hates herself for letting you down. She hates that you think less of her. She hates herself because she knows that you’re going through alot right now and she more than anything doesn’t want you to be alone.”  
“I’m not alone. Not completely.”  
“You still have Supergirl.” Alex stated simply, because of course she would know about that.  
“Does it make me pathetic if I only have two people in my life who have ever truly believed in me. And one I scared away while the other is an superhero alien from another planet who is incapable of thinking badly of anyone?”  
“Yeah, it would make you quite pathetic. Good thing you have three people who believe in you.” Alex said with a smirk, even though it was sadness that showed in her eyes.  
Lena shook her head but smirked back. “That is a good thing then.”  
Alex made no movement to leave, so Lena continued. “How is she. Kara, I mean?”  
“Truthfully?”  
“Yes, please always be honest with me.”  
Alex nodded. “She had a very bad few days because she missed her best friend. Her words, not mine.”  
Lena was going to argue or at least comment on the statement, but Alex continued instead. “But she had two of her friends visit her and they’ve been a big help in keeping her distracted.”  
“Speaking of staying distracted, I noticed that there seemed to be some unknown vigilantes in the news this morning. No one seems to have any pictures, but eyewitness accounts have been quite interesting. If the tabloids are anything to go by.”  
“Is that your way of finishing for information to see if they’re working for me or with Supergirl?” Alex asked with a raised eyebrow.  
“It’s my way of changing a very painful subject and putting water under the bridge between the two of us.”  
“Of the record?”  
“I’m not a reporter, your sister is. And she hasn’t written about them yet, so are they real or not?”  
“White Canary and Speedy are definitely real, but don’t get too used to them because they’re just passing through.”  
Lena’s eyes widened. “Just passing through...from another universe?”  
Alex huffed. “Supergirl really needs to learn to keep her mouth shut.”  
Lena was silent while in deep thought. That would explain why she hadn’t had any unexpected drop-ins from the Girl of Steel in the last few days. She would be lying to herself if she said she didn’t miss the other girl. It was hard having just one person to rely on. She raised her gaze and took in Alex. Maybe she did have more people in her life now.  
“I understand that you felt betrayed by Kara, after everything you’ve been through. I can’t imagine what it would be like to always have people judging you for who they think you are. I couldn’t stand the thought when I worried about my mom and my sister, and deep down I did know that they would always love me. But that fear, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.” She let mirth shine in her eyes as she added, “not even you, Miss Luthor.”  
Lena rolled her eyes playfully. “I appreciate the sentiment, Agent Danvers. But I let the Luthors down way before they let me down.”  
Alex furrowed her brows in confusion. “What do you mean?”  
“Honestly? My mother was not only xenophobic and completely mental, but she was also homophobic as well. So when she flew to Ireland to drop in at my boarding school, let’s just say she didn’t approve of my girlfriend.”  
Alex’s eyes widened in mortification. “Wow, I...so you’re…”  
“Irish? No.” Lena smirked and Alex smiled as well.  
“I actually wish I would have taken the time to know you sooner, Lena.” Alex told her honestly. “I like you.”  
Lena blushed and shook her head. “I’m flattered, but you’re not really my type. No offense.”  
Alex blushed even darker than Lena did and stuttered in response. “I didn’t mean, I’m not...I have...Maggie!”  
Both girls burst out laughing when they understood the error. When the embarrassment wore off, they fidgeted awkwardly until Alex decided that she had enough mortification for the day and that it was time to leave. She stood up quickly and cleared her throat before she spoke.  
“Kara will obey your wishes and keep her space, so I...when you are ready or if you ever want to let her back in...you’ll have to go to her.”  
“I need time.”  
Alex nodded in understanding. Lena didn’t say “never,” and she certainly deserved whatever time it took. Alex was beyond grateful that for whatever reason, Lena didn’t shut Supergirl out. Because if Kara had no way of being around the young Luthor, Alex knew her sister would have been completely inconsolable. And having the distraction of her friends from Earth-1 (which still completely freaked Alex out) did help, for Lena’s sake, Alex hoped Kara didn’t get “too distracted” by them. She saw the way Sara looked at her sister after all. And although, she would willingly admit that Sara was badass and beautiful, after today’s visit she actually was rooting for Lena Luthor. Even if Lena had yet realized that the reason she may have been so hurt by Kara’s betrayal was because she harbored feelings for the girl. 

 

Sssssssssssssss

 

Sara and Thea had joined Kara for lunch the second day in a row. She had been at an absolute low when she finally used Cisco’s inter-dimensional device and basically begged some of her friends to come visit her. Thea and Sara had been the only ones able to make it, but they had been more than enough. Alex actually adored both of them, especially when they all went to train in the DEO and Sara handed Alex’s ass to her in a sparring match.  
Not many people impressed her sister, but her two newest friends seemed to easily enough. Maybe it had been the fact that they were human heroes on their Earth, and so they had a sort of kindred spirit. But Alex also liked that Sara and Thea were teaching Kara hand to hand combat that was far more advanced than anything she had been able to teach her. Kara knew that Alex wanted her to be able to properly defend herself if she were ever de-powered. And she was making vast improvements in such a short time working with her friends.  
After another night of cleaning up crime in National City as a team, they decided to take it easy today and actually talk about the real reason that Kara begged for their assistance.  
“You know we’re more than happy to spend time with you Kara, but you don’t need us to help you stop petty crimes.” Thea told her honestly while in the empty lunchroom at Catco.  
“How have things been for you guys, since the whole Dominator thing?” Kara asked instead.  
The other girls glanced at each other, and shared the same anguished look.  
“When we were captured and kept in the dreamworld…” Thea tried to explain but it was difficult because the pain was still so raw. She lost everything all over again.  
Kara put her hand on the younger girl’s. “You don’t have to talk about it, I’m sorry I asked.”  
“It’s just that we lost so much already. I lost my sister, Thea lost both of her parents. Her mom was killed in front of her when Deathstroke made Oliver choose between his mom and his sister.” Sara explained.  
Kara’s eyes widened and she glanced to Thea, pain evident on all of their faces.  
“It’s bad enough to lose everything and everyone you care about, you know that.” Sara continued. “You probably know that even better than us. But imagine if you had to live through that twice, and couldn’t do anything to stop it.”  
Thoughts of her last moments on Krypton flooded Kara’s mind. She reminded vividly how heart-broken and terrified she was when her mom put her in the spaceship and told her she wasn’t going with her. She remembered how scared she had been when she thought she had failed again, and that all of her alien friends in National City were about to be killed by the Medusa virus. She was never one for hatred, but when she thought she failed...when she thought Lena betrayed her...she had to admit that she hadn’t felt pain like that since she left her home planet and everyone she cared about. Feeling so helpless when you are supposedly all-powerful is a hard thing to live with.  
Sara sensed the war brewing inside her new friend and put her hand over Kara’s. The three sat in a tortured silence for a few minutes before Thea spoke again.  
“I didn’t want to leave. I knew it was all fake, that none of it was real. But I didn’t care, I wanted to stay and pretend forever. I almost did.”  
“And no one would have blamed you, Thea.” Kara offered sincerely and Sara nodded in agreement. “I’m glad you didn’t stay, but I would have understood.”  
Thea smiled at her sadly. “I told Ollie that maybe that dream world was his reward for all the things he suffered through in this lifetime. That maybe it was the happy ending we all deserved.”  
“You do deserve a happy ending.” Kara emphasized with a squeeze of her hand that was on Thea’s. Then turned her attention toward Sara. “So do you. I mean, you guys got murdered and your souls were sent to Hell...I’m sure that you...I’m making assumptions because I can’t truly understand what you went through...but for you to survive that, to come back from the dead and then become a hero and try to restore your souls. I don’t think anyone deserves a happy ending more than either of you. Especially, since you got that second chance Sara, and your sister didn’t.”  
“So when do we get our happy ending?” Sara asked with a shaky breath.  
“When you stop torturing yourself and learn to forgive yourself for the past and things we can’t change.” Kara explained, she glanced at Thea to make sure the other girl was listening to her as well. “That is definitely something I have to work on as well. We can’t change the past, but we can change. We can make sure we don’t make the same mistakes. We can try to be better each day.”  
Sara laughed humorously as she quickly swiped at a tear that was threatening to fall down her face. “How can you be better than you already are?”  
Kara pushed her glasses up further on her face and then wiped away the tears from Sara’s cheeks. “We all have things to work on.”  
Movement out of the corner of her eye startled Kara and she glanced toward the open doorway to seen Lena turning around and hurrying away. She stood up quickly which made both of her friends notice the distraction.  
“I’m sorry, will you excuse me for a minute?”  
She hurried after Kara with as much speed as she could attribute to being human, but still wasn’t able to catch up with her until the brunette reached the elevator.  
“I didn’t mean to interrupt.” Lena said quickly as Kara approached her.  
“I’m glad to see you Lena, whatever the reason.” She was about to ask how the girl was, but thought better of it and bit her bottom lip to stop from saying something equally as stupid.  
“Your sister visited me yesterday.” Lena said by way of explanation.  
“Oh, Rao.” Kara muttered under her breath, which garnered an odd expression from Lena. “I apologize for anything that she may have said to upset you. I love her to death, but she can be quite protective of me sometimes. Too often actually.”  
Lena smiled at her genuinely. “I think it’s sweet.”  
Kara chuckled. “You’ve never lied to me Lena, don’t start now.”  
The intense stare the brunette gave her made Kara nervously look away as she anxiously tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and fiddled with her glasses.  
“You’re right. It was also oddly terrifying, and I’m a Luthor.”  
“Only in name.” Kara commented which earned her another soft smile. “Are you ever going to tell me what my sister said to you?”  
“I will later, I don’t want to keep you from…” She gestured toward the direction they had come from.  
Kara’s eyes widened. “Join us! I want to introduce you to some of my friends.”  
Lena bit her lip in consideration and had been about ready to decline the offer when she felt Kara’s hand slip in hers and found herself being drug toward the lunchroom anyway. Instead of putting up a fight, she exhaled in relief and interlaced her fingers.  
They weren’t even to the door when Kara overheard Sara talking to Thea.  
“But seriously though. This is the best Earth ever.”  
“Just because all the hot girls also happen to like girls, doesn’t mean you can stay here indefinitely.”  
“Shhh, don’t say it too loudly. She has super hearing, remember.”  
Kara tried to control her blush as she walked around the corner and led Lena into the room, but she knew she failed when she saw Thea smirk and reply in a whisper. “Too late, she already heard you.”  
“Hi guys!” Kara said over enthusiastically.  
Sara and Thea smiled at her affectionately but Lena suddenly seemed uncomfortable. Kara dropped Lena’s hand and stepped toward her friends. “This is Lena. She’s my…” she glanced at Lena as if to ask permission and Lena nodded which caused Kara to actually glow. “Friend. We’re friends.”  
Sara narrowed her eyes as she studied them. That was not what she expected Kara to say. Thea recovered better though, and she stood up and walked to the newest addition to their group.  
“It’s nice to meet you, Lena.” She extended her hand and Lena shook it easily. “I’m Thea.”  
“The pleasure’s all mine, Thea.”  
When Sara made no move to leave, Kara introduced her. “That’s Sara.”  
“Don’t mind her, she lost her soul to the underworld, along with any manners she might have possessed.” Thea teased.  
“I slept with my sister’s boyfriend. I never had any manners.” Sara replied coldly.  
Kara was confused by Sara’s sudden coldness and decided to defend her. “They’re kidding, really. Sara is actually sweet and although she sometimes has...lapses in judgement…”  
Sara and Thea laughed out loud.  
“She is a good person.” Kara continued adamantly.  
Lena narrowed her eyes and turned toward Kara. “Your sister was right, you put way too much faith in people.”  
“Hey!” Sara stood up, but Thea quickly shot her a death glare that kept her from actually advancing on Lena.  
Kara looked around the room nervously, things were getting out of control really quickly. She didn’t know what to do to calm the situation. She rested her hand on Lena’s shoulder, which immediately relaxed the brunette. Thea returned to her seat and pulled Sara down with her.  
“We we in the middle of lunch and we have more than enough to go around. Please join us.” Thea motioned toward the food.  
Sara didn’t argue as Kara drug Lena to the table. When Lena reached for the last potsticker though, Kara nearly jumped across the table to stop her. No one but Sara seemed to notice, so she secretly pushed her plate of food over to Kara who devoured it happily.  
“So, Lena. What do you do?” Thea asked conversationally.  
“She’s the CEO of L-Corp! It’s an international organization that featured very advanced technology that Lena is using to create real change in the world.” Kara interrupted and explained with excitement and pride.  
“So she is more than just a pretty face.” Sara replied and although she had been surprised, she was truly impressed.  
“Yes, she is very smart. And kind…” Kara pushed her glasses further up her nose nervously. “Not that she’s not pretty. She is. Gorgeous in fact. But she’s a genius, too.”  
Lena blushed and Sara smirked. Thea smiled at Kara knowingly.  
“And rich, I’d assume.” Sara stated.  
“Yeah, but that’s the least interesting thing about her.” Kara mumbled but when she realized she was heard, she looked down at the table and shoveled more food into her mouth.  
Lena recovered enough to clear her throat and contribute to the conversation herself. “How about the two of you, what do you do?”  
“I own and manage a nightclub. And I ran my brother’s mayoral campaign.” Thea answered.  
“A fellow entrepreneur. I’m impressed.” Lena told her honestly. “How about you, Sara?”  
The blonde bristled. “I’m between jobs right now.”  
“She does some freelance work. Travels where she’s needed.” Kara explained in a way that ended that line of questioning, and Sara was grateful for it.  
“How do you two know Kara?” Lena asked.  
“Through a mutual friend when she came to visit him.” Thea explained vaguely.  
Lena took that as a cue to not pry any further.  
“Oh, so what did Alex say to you?” Kara asked after a few moments of awkward silence.  
Lena shrugged. “Just came to tell me to get my head out of my ass and forgive you already.” Lena admitted, but added with a smirk. “But you know, in a sweet way.”  
Thea and Sara chuckled at that.  
“Are we talking about the same Alex? Because she’s not...sweet.” Thea teased.  
“What could Kara have done that she’d have to be forgiven for?” Sara wondered.  
Lena was about to answer but Kara beat her to it. “I did the one thing I promised myself I’d never do.”  
Lena raised an eyebrow at Kara’s response but didn’t question her.  
“And what was that?” Thea asked.  
“I let her down and made her think that she was alone and that she didn’t deserve to have a real friend who cared about her. I gave her further reason to expect the worst in people and because of that, I lost her trust in a way that will be hard to get back.”  
Lena swallowed thickly because for the most part, Kara hit the nail on the head. She really did know her.  
They were all silent for a moment. Then Sara shook her head and smiled softly. “You know what, the fact that someone like you is capable of a mistake that big..”  
“Hey!” Kara retorted with offense.  
Sara waved her off. “It’s a compliment. If you aren’t perfect, then how the hell can the rest of us expect to be. It’s a relief really. What you said earlier about the fact that we can’t change our past but we can change ourselves, that we can work to be better than the day before...I think I finally get what you were saying. We all make mistakes, we all do royally stupid things. But as long as we don’t keep making the same mistakes, then we’ve got a chance. Because we all do deserve to be happy. We’ve been through so much to not have earned it.”  
Lena’s whole impression of Sara changed in that moment. Yes, she was annoying as hell and arrogant and obnoxious and they’d never actually be friends. But she didn’t hate her...completely. She let the words wash over her and knowing that Kara was the one who said them first, it gave her hope again. Hope that what they had could be mended. Hope that all was not lost. And more than that, it gave her permission to leave her past completely behind her and start fresh today. Like Kara told her, she was a Luthor in name only. The rest of it was up to her.  
The rest of the lunch went more smoothly after that.

 

Ssssssssss

 

Later that evening, Kara was saying goodbye to her friends.  
“I’m glad you had us over and we hope we were able to help you through whatever it was that made you so upset.” Thea said, though she now understood that Kara’s sadness was a direct result in having let her friend (but really so much more than a friend) Lena down.  
“Yeah. I am feeling better. I wish we all lived on the same Earth.” Kara admitted.  
“So do I.” Sara said. “But honestly, I know we’re in control of our own lives and we can’t change the past...but why are we always the ones who have to sacrifice everything for the greater good?”  
Kara shrugged. “Maybe because we’re the only ones willing to sacrifice.”  
Sara sighed. “Being the good guy really sucks sometimes.”  
“It helps though, knowing we’re not alone. Knowing that as hard as we have it, we aren’t the only ones.” Thea added. “At least, it helps me a little. Knowing that I can talk to you or not talk to you and it doesn’t really matter because I know you’ll understand anyway.”  
“Yeah, it’s nice to know you and the others are out there. Even if we don’t see each other all the time, it’s nice to know that I have you.”  
“Don’t be a stranger, okay?” Sara said as the portal appeared. Then she kissed Kara on the cheek, as close to her mouth as she good. “We’re only a world away.”  
Kara blushed as Sara stepped away, then she hugged Thea tightly. Then they were gone, and a part of her felt alone again. She felt lighter after making up with Lena today, but also sadder. She wasn’t sure how the two emotions could be so strong at the same time. It was those thoughts that had her flying through National City. She hadn’t planned on it, but soon she found herself in front of L-Corp and new it was where she was meant to be. The lights were on in Lena’s office, while the rest of the building was dark. So she flew up to the balcony and watched her in silence for awhile. When she felt as if she was intruding she turned away and instead sat on the ledge and looked out over the city that she loved.  
She was so lost in thought, that even with super hearing she failed to hear Lena join her outside.  
“I was beginning to think you forgot about me.” Lena teased wistfully, though there had been a hint of something in her voice.  
Instead of facing her, Supergirl patted the ledge next to her.  
“Yeah, that’s not going to happen. I trust that you’d catch me if I fell, but I don’t want to risk it by setting up there with you.” Is was when Lena further approached the girl, that she saw distinct sadness in the hero’s eyes. “You want to talk about it?”  
Kara faced her. “Talk about what?”  
“Whatever it is that has you contemplating your place in the universe.”  
“How’d you know?”  
“I know loneliness when I see it.”  
Kara removed herself from the ledge gracefully and joined Lena on solid ground. “I shouldn’t be lonely. I mean, I know I said before that it sucks to be the only Kryptonian with any memories of Krypton, but…”  
“You actually like Earth. And maybe a part of you feels like you're forsaking your birth home by embracing this home so easily.”  
Kara was contemplatively silent. “How do you do that?”  
“Do what?”  
“Understand me so well?”  
Lena sucked in a shuddering breath, her eyes on the horizon not the woman in front of her. “Like I said, I understand loneliness. And duty. And regret.”  
“I have some friends, superhero friends. And they have lost as much as me. In some cases, they've lost more. They put on a mask and they get out there and they fight and make sacrifices and lose people they love. Sometimes, even at the risk of being the reason that the people they love end of dying. But it was their choice. And because of that, they can live with it. And yes, I make the choice to be Supergirl, just like Barry made the choice to be The Flash. But neither of us were born with our powers. It is something that happened to us. Him because some freak explosion and me because of all the planets I could have landed on, it happened to be one with a yellow sun. Fate. Destiny. Whatever you want to call it. But some things will always be out of our control. I didn’t ask to be special. To have powers. And some people have told me that I would have been a hero even without them. But my friend, White Canary, she just asked me why is it that we always have to be the ones who had to sacrifice everything all the time.”  
“What did you tell her?”  
“That we always had to sacrifice everything because we were the ones willing to do it.”  
Lena nodded in understanding. “And now you’re wondering why you are always so willing to sacrifice so that others can have what you may never have.”  
Kara nodded reluctantly.  
“I’m so glad you didn’t come here to tell me that everybody suffers, and to just get over it.” Lena teased.  
Kara’s eyes widened. “I would never.” She sighed. “I hate when people say that. Just because other people have it bad too, doesn’t make your life any better.”  
“Exactly.”  
Kara narrowed her eyes. “Is that your way of telling me that even though I do make sacrifices, that it doesn’t mean that I’m the only one making them?”  
“Your Martian friend came out to the pier to fight even though the toxin would have killed him. Alex Danvers is only human, yet she suits up and battles aliens who could easily kill her. Your friends on the other Earth, some are human and are stupid enough to fight with bows and arrows…” she smirked. “But they do it so that other people can have a normal life. But what about the normal people you are protecting? They sacrifice time with their families by going to work to support those families. They sometimes take a job they hate so that they can send their kids to a better school.”  
“And sometimes, parents give up the kids they love in the hope that they will have a better life than they can provide for them.” Supergirl stated as much for herself as for Lena Luthor.  
Lena’s breathing became labored. She had always assumed that she was so unlovable, even as a child, that even her real parents couldn’t stand her. But what if they had been homeless or dying or struggling in a way that they didn’t want Lena to have to go through that kind of pain. Maybe they did hope that she had a better life without them. That she deserved better than what they could give her. And maybe they were excited that she went to a rich family that could give her anything she could have ever wanted. How were they to know that the Luthors would turn out so evil, that they would make her life so miserable?  
She jumped when she felt Supergirl’s hand rest on her shoulder, and a sense of deja vu passed over her. She glanced at the girl who was now standing directly in front of her, and for the first time noticed a light shade of lipstick smudged at the corner of Supergirl’s mouth. The calmness she had felt a moment ago suddenly sent an icy shudder throughout her body.  
“Your cold.” Supergirl murmured as she pulled the brunette into a firm hug. “I guess you made your point, everyone sacrifices something. And even if I didn’t choose everything about my life, the parts that I have control over are the parts that matter most. And I really wouldn’t change any of that.”  
Kara led Lena inside where it was warmer, the sat on the couch beside her. It had been awhile since she was here in that capacity. A friendly visit as Kara Danvers and not Supergirl. But she hoped that Lena showing up to Catco meant she was ready to move forward with forgiving her.  
“How about you? I told you I would be here if you needed me and since I hadn’t heard from you in a few days, I hope that means that things are starting to look up for you?”  
Lena’s mind was still reeling and she didn’t know what it all meant. Her silence made Kara continue to ramble.  
“I know things aren’t good for you right now. And that they really have never been good for you. But if I learned anything these last few weeks, it’s how resilient people are. As bad as things get and as sad and lonely as I get sometimes, I never lose sight of the fact that I truly am happy here. And like you mentioned, maybe that is what keeps me feeling sad. Like survivor’s guilt or something. I’m alive and they are not. Why me?”  
The last question snapped Lena out of her stupor. “Why you? Because you are what Earth needed. You give us hope that things can get better. That there is more good than evil in this world. You are the reason I believe in people. I believe in aliens. Both are capable of evil but both are capable of good too, and I never saw it with Superman but I see it with you. You make us want to be better, because you already believe that we are better. And not in some idealistic way. You still see us as we are. You see the good and the bad and you don’t simply dismiss the bad, you acknowledge it as part of us and you understand that the bad parts of us are what make us real.”  
“Real?”  
“Superman always appeared to be some sort of boy scout. All ‘golly gee, yes ma’am’.”  
Kara smiled at that.  
“Sure he is a hero and he brought out the best in the people in Metropolis.” She paused. “Except for Lex.”  
“But because of him, because of his power...he also brought supervillains who had something to prove. Green Arrow told me that it was because of people like us that so many bad things were happening. We don’t just bring out the best in people, we bring out the worst. Their fear. Their lust for power.”  
“Maybe. But the world wasn’t a perfect place before you or Superman took the the skies. There was still war. Famine. Disease. Greed. Hate. Your presence doesn’t create those things. As I was saying, Superman is an ideal that people might try to aspire to. But when they fall short because they have him so high up on a pedestal, then...that’s when Lex went mad.”  
Realization dawned on Kara. “All my fumbling around and mistakes and…”  
Lena nodded. “Perfection is hard to live up to. Just because we have seen you fall and then rise again, just because you make us all better and you give us hope...we have to be careful not to forget that you are still just someone who is trying their best. We have to acknowledge that some nights instead of beating up bad guys, you just want to sit on a ledge and contemplate your existence.”  
“You make me sound so emo.” Kara pouted.  
“Hardly. I’ve seen photos of Superman saving the day, and I’ve been around to witness you actually doing it. You are giddy and excited and bubbly and cheerful. I mean, you take selfies with kids and you high five your team when you come up victorious.”  
Kara blushed at that.  
“You’re wholesome and pure in a way that's refreshing.”  
Kara smiled and wrung out her hands nervously when Lena reached forward and brought her thumb to the corner of Supergirl’s mouth. Lena wiped at the lipstick that was smeared there and pulled away her thumb to show the caped hero.  
“Well, apparently, not that wholesome.” Lena attempted for light-hearted banter, but knew instinctively that she fell short.  
Kara’s mouth opened and closed humorously and Lena couldn’t fight the small smile at it brought out of her.  
“Don’t worry, your sapphic tryst is safe with me.” When Kara didn’t respond, Lena continued. “I didn’t realize Supergirl was into girls.”  
Kara stood up quickly. “I’m not. I’m...it’s not…” She ran her hands through her hair. “I never really thought about it before...labels and stuff because there are no labels like this on Krypton. There wasn’t a whole lot of romance or anything, it was kind of arranged marriages and political advancement. The best candidate won, regardless of sex. Anyway….I don’t have a preference either way. Romantically or sexually I mean.” Her face was as red as her cape. “Man, woman, human or alien. Love is love. You know.”  
Lena watched as Supergirl rambled adorably. “Who knew Supergirl was so progressive.”  
“Yup, that’s me. Full of surprises.”  
Lena it her lip anxiously and before she was able to think better of it, she replied. “Since we’re having a heart to heart, there’s something I might as well confess.”  
Supergirl was beside her on the couch in a flash, and took Lena’s hands in her own compassionately.  
“I am...not straight.” Lena sighed loudly. “This never gets easier does it? Coming out I mean? It’s like I know you’ll be fine with it and accept me, but somehow the words still get caught in my throat.”  
Kara closed the distance between them and wrapped Lena in a hug so tight it nearly suffocated her.  
“Oh, sorry.” Kara must have realized as much so she loosened her hold but didn’t pull entirely away, only enough to look Lena straight in the eye. “Thank you for telling me, I appreciate that you feel safe enough to share your true self with me. I know how hard it was for Alex and I would never want you to think that I will feel any less about you for it. I promise you that nothing will change between us, you don’t have to worry about that.”  
It was meant to be reassuring, Lena was sure, but somehow those words twisted in her stomach and made her feel nauseous.  
“Thank you.” She whispered, but she needed to get away from the other girl now before she said or did anything else monumentally stupid.  
Lena eased herself out of Supergirl’s hold, and stood from the couch. “I appreciate you coming over to check on me, and I hope that I was able to help you feel a little better because you seemed really sad when you first got here.”  
Kara nodded. “I’ll survive. I always do.”  
Lena shook her head. “Someday, maybe we’ll both learn to do more than just survive.”  
Kara smiled at her affectionately. “Someday soon, I hope.”  
“Me too.”

 

Sssssssssss

 

Lena didn’t sleep much the night before. Not at all if she were being honest. After the visit from Supergirl, she got a text from Kara thanking her for joining her at lunch today. They texted back and forth for about an hour before Lena couldn’t take it any longer and told Kara that she had to go to bed. And she did, but then she just laid in bed wide awake and cursed her stupid life.  
Kara brought a coffee to her office earlier that morning, but Lena couldn’t bring herself to enjoy the girl’s company as much as she usually did. Not that she hadn’t already forgiven the girl, because let’s face it, there wasn’t really anything to forgive. Kara had tried in her own way to protect Lena from her sister, it hadn’t been a form of betrayal. In fact, Kara had never lost faith in her and maybe that’s what hurt so bad.  
She couldn’t hide the attraction anymore. She couldn’t explain the feelings away as mere friendship. She couldn’t deny that she had been jealous of Kara and Sara when she saw them together the day before. Everything about Kara told her that she should keep her distance and not allow herself to be further hurt, but apparently Lena was a masochist. She let her fingers brush against Kara’s when she took the coffee from her. She sat a bit too closely to her on the couch as they drank it in a comfortable silence. And when Kara had to dismiss herself to leave for work, she allowed herself to be pulled in for a hug that she never wanted to end. For as much happiness as she received from being in the mere proximity of the other girl, the pain that it wreaked on her heart was just as powerful, if not moreso.  
Which is why she was pacing in her office when Alex Danvers stormed in the room.  
“What’s so urgent and serious that I had to keep my visit a secret from my sister?” Alex asked by way of greeting.  
“I’m sure she told you I went to visit her at her work yesterday, and that we...that I forgave her and we’re friends again.”  
Alex nodded.  
“Did she tell you I came out to her last night. Well, not her but Supergirl.”  
Alex’s mouth dropped open.  
“Yeah, I know she’s Supergirl.”  
“How long?”  
“Almost the whole time. She’s not subtle. And she’s a terrible liar.”  
Alex nodded with affection. “I keep telling her that, but she seems to think that she can be sneaky.”  
Lena laughed out loud at that. “She once told me that she got here quickly, because she flew...on a bus.”  
Alex chuckled as she shook her head. “Sounds about right. Cat Grant had her pegged as Supergirl like Day One. And as if that wasn’t enough, she told Winn and Lucy just because.”  
“Lucy?”  
“Lane. Lois’s sister.”  
Lena’s eyes widened. “She’s in the Army and General Lane hates aliens.”  
“Like I said, she can be too trusting sometimes.”  
“Does she not trust me? Is that why she hasn’t told me?”  
Alex rolled her eyes. “She likes to think she’s clever and that you not knowing somehow protects you.”  
Lena nodded thoughtfully.  
“I want to ask you something though...you told Kara to stay away because she hurt you, but you didn’t keep Supergirl away...”  
Lena shrugged. “Luthors are great at compartmentalizing. Kara hurt me, Supergirl did not.”  
Alex narrowed her eyes. “And you didn’t want to be alone.”  
“I told you how pathetic I am that only two people ever truly believed in me. How awful is it that they are both the same person?”  
Alex relaxed and her face filled with empathy. “You wanted there to be two people that you could count on. Two people that cared about you.”  
Lena sat at her desk stiffly. “Like I said, pathetic.”  
“Hey, the best person I have ever known cares about you so much, that has to mean something.”  
Lena’s shoulders sagged and sorrow colored her features. “It means something, but not what I want it to.” She looked up at Alex and locked eyes with her. “I’m in love with your sister. And last night, when I came out to her...she assured me that things would never change between us.”  
Alex sat on the desk and regarded the younger girl. “As Supergirl, she assured her friend that it nothing could ever make her care any less about her. As Kara...she probably would have said the same thing because she is socially awkward at times and doesn’t see what is so obvious to the rest of us.”  
Lena wiped at her wet cheeks as shook her head. “You’re probably right. It’s just...did you know that Sara kissed her?”  
Alex nodded slowly. “I am her sister, she tells me everything.”  
“So you also know that she came out to me last night.”  
“I’ll admit, when she told me that she was into girls and boys and aliens and humans, it was a bit...overwhelming. But it was also...Kara. She has such a capacity for love, it’s unbelievable sometimes. She has no idea how proud of her I am. How grateful I am that of all the families she could have had when she landed here, that I am so glad it was mine. I tell her these things, she knows she means more to me than anything. Hell, I commandeered a spaceship and flew it to outerspace to save when she was intent on sacrificing herself to save the rest of us last year.”  
“None of that sentence surprises me actually.”  
Alex smirked. “Yeah because there are time traveling assassins from another dimension.”  
“Ex-assassins. Who also happen to be hot bisexuals and kiss unsuspecting aliens.”  
“See when you say it like that, it’s almost funny.”  
“Tell me, do I have a chance against someone like that?” Lena asked with complete vulnerability.  
“Kara likes you Lena. And maybe she isn’t ready to see it yet, or maybe she is scared that you won’t like her if you knew she was Supergirl. She already betrayed you once and she probably feels like she’s betraying you again by lying to you.”  
“She told you.” Lena accused.  
Alex sighed. “She believes that if you ever find out that she is actually Supergirl, then you will think that she hurt you on purpose when she comforted you as Supergirl. She believes that you will think she doesn’t trust you with her secret, when in all reality, she has wanted to tell you since you helped save her at your own gala. And everything else that she may or may not have told me, that is for her to tell you.”  
“I don’t feel betrayed or used by her. I need her to know that. I understand that she gave me the distance I requested, because she didn’t know I knew. And she kept coming to me as Supergirl because she knew that even if I said I wanted to be alone….that was the furthest thing from the truth. She was who I needed her to be in the way I needed her. And unfortunately, it was that selflessness, that complete understanding, that made me full even more deeply in love with her.”  
Alex nodded. “For what it’s worth, I’m rooting for you Lena.”  
“Thank you.”

 

Ssssssssss

 

It was late at night, but of course Lena was still in her office. Kara didn’t even try to woman’s apartment building because she knew where the girl would be. She landed on the balcony and opened the sliding door. Lena glanced at her in a way that made Supergirl believe she expected her to come.  
“So...my sister told me everything.” Kara greeted softly, and noticed for the first time that Lena actually faltered at her words.  
“Everything?” She sounded as hopeful as she did vulnerable.  
Lena studied the other girl. Kara seemed hopeful as well, and relieved and somewhat excited. It was enough to give Lena hope.  
“And now that you know….how do you feel?” Lena asked as she stood up and approached the girl.  
“Honestly, so much better. Especially know that you don’t actually hate me.”  
“I could never hate you.”  
“I wanted to say that I’m sorry for...not saying anything sooner. Everything got so...complicated.”  
“I understand. But at least we cleared the air. It’s all out on the table. Come what may, right.” Lena answered as she took another step forward.  
Kara nodded. “So Alex didn’t say how long...when did you first realize?”  
“When you first walked in with Clark, I ignored you but I noticed you. It was hard not to. You always say that you are living in the shadow of Superman...but you outshine him so much more than you realize.”  
Kara smiled. “Thank you.”  
“It’s true. Anyway, when you spoke...I couldn’t pretend that you weren’t there anymore.”  
“So when you had the alien detection device?”  
Lena furrowed her brows at the swift turn in the conversation. What did any of that matter? Lena wanted to know when Kara realized that she felt the same way about her. So she waved her hand as if waving off the question, but then noticed the look in Kara’s eyes that told her she really wanted to know the answer.  
“It was actually...fake. I...you were different, Kara. You said that you didn’t care that I was a Luthor and then we were talking and I just thought….you are a reporter, and I wanted to know what kind of article you would write about a Luthor who created a alien detection device.”  
Kara frowned. “But I told you that I wrote a scathing piece about you.”  
Lena shrugged. “You also said that you were told to rewrite it and you were glad that you did. And it was in that moment that I knew that you were sincere when you told me that you didn’t see me as just a Luthor.”  
“I thought it was real so I fried it with my heat vision, I really hope it wasn’t anything expensive.”  
Lena laughed. “I did wonder about that. It was a fingerprint sensor wireless remote control. It hasn’t worked properly since.”  
“I hate that we had to lie to each other just to find out if we could trust each other.”  
“I hate that we wasted so much time.”  
“But we got there in the end. I feel so much better knowing that I don’t have to hide who I am from you anymore. And relieved that you don’t feel like my...lying to you was in any way a reflection of my trust in you.”  
“Supervillians use people you care about against you, I should know because Lex did the same to Superman.”  
“And Alex can protect herself and most of my friends. Well, not Winn. I am scared for him all the time. But you, as a Luthor, already have people who want to kill you....I couldn’t live with myself if I ever put you in further risk.”  
“In case you’ve forgotten, I can take care of myself pretty well. At the gala, on the pier...I saved you just as much as you saved me.” She smirked and was happy when she received a blush from the superhero.  
“You have actually proven quite useful, next time there’s a threat to the world I may request your assistance. I know that Winn and Alex are impressed with you. Which, by the way, means a lot because Alex is not easily impressed.”  
“She is quite taken with you.”  
Kara rolled her eyes. “She’s my sister, she’s supposed to say those kinds of things.”  
“She would die for you, Kara. If she had to.”  
Grief washed over Kara’s face. “Let’s hope that never happens.”  
The silence got awkward briefly, before Lena took a chance. “I seem to be at a disadvantage because you know everything about me and yet you haven’t said how you feel about it all. About me.”  
Kara perked up and pulled Lena in for a warm embrace. When she pulled away, she smiled. “I already told you, I’m glad you know. I couldn’t be happier to have it all out in the open.”  
Lena masked her pain when she realized that Kara didn’t actually know everything as she claimed to. Apparently, Alex must have only told Kara that Lena knew her secret, not that she was in love with her. Panic bubbled in her chest, she was far too much a coward to put herself even further out there. She had hoped that when she outed herself, that all of her flirting would have not gone unnoticed. She thought she had always been overtly flirtatious with the girl, and direct enough that when she let Kara know she prefered girls, that Kara would automatically jump to the proper conclusion. But it appeared Alex had been right about Kara’s cluelessness.  
Kara noticed the change in Lena’s demeanor and wanted to assure the girl that things were still great between them, that this didn’t have to change anything.  
“Do you not know what you mean to me?” Kara asked seriously. “I keep telling you that you understand me in ways that no one else ever could. That I feel less alone with you. I would hope that I make you feel the same way.”  
Lena smiled sadly. “Yes, of course. You make me believe that I deserve good things.”  
“That’s because you do.”  
“Deserving what you always wanted and getting it are not the same thing,”  
Kara touched her cheek softly. “You’ll get whatever it is. Some things are worth the wait.”  
A siren in the distance interrupted their moment, and Kara actually growled which caused Lena to smile fondly at her.  
“A hero’s work is never done.” Lena replied as she stepped away from Supergirl.  
“I don’t know how Sara does it, she doesn’t have a secret identity or anything right now. She’s just always a superhero. I can’t imagine giving up the part of myself that allows me to feel...normal.”  
“Supergirl, I hate to break it to you but you will never be just normal.”  
Kara smiled with affection at the brunette. “One can always hope.”  
And with that, she flew into the that night sky. Lena watched her helplessly as she thought about the fact that she would wait forever for that girl, if she knew she’d get her in the end. She was completely distraught and feeling unhinged by the confrontation that veered so far off course from the way she had assumed it was going to go.

 

Ssssssssssss

 

Alex had pulled up to Kara’s apartment building when her phone rang.  
“You told her I knew she was Supergirl but not that I was in love with her?”  
Lena’s pitch was higher than usual and it didn’t take long for Alex to realize the state the other girl was in.  
“Lena, what happened?”  
“She was all relieved and hopeful and happy and excited, and I stupidly thought it meant that she returned my feelings because she came rushing inside and said you told her everything.”  
“Oh, honey.” Alex truly felt for the girl. She knew exactly what it was like to feel so lost and to feel needlessly rejected by someone you had fallen for.  
“It turns out, she was all of those things just because she could be herself and not have to lie to me anymore.”  
“But isn’t that a good thing. You obviously mean a great deal to her.”  
“Can’t you just tell me if she feels the same way? I could endure the wait, if I knew I had a chance.”  
Alex saw Kara fly into the window of her apartment building and an idea formed in her head. “I can do you one better.”  
With that, she hung up her phone and ran full speed up to Kara’s apartment. She barged through the door to find that her sister had already changed out of her Supergirl suit and into her “Kara” clothes.  
“Alex, hey!” Kara greeted happily as her sister entered the room.  
“Kara, we’ve got to go.”  
“What’s wrong?”  
“Lena, she…”  
The next thing Alex knew, she was being held securely in Kara’s arms as they flew at top speed toward L-Corp. When they safely touched ground, Alex leaned over the ledge of the balcony and threw up the contents of her last meal.  
“Is everything okay?” Lena asked with amusement from the sliding door.  
“Are you okay? Alex said that you...well, she didn’t exactly say anything because I didn’t give her the chance.” Kara finished lamely as she patted her sister softly on the back. “Sorry.”  
“The things I do for you, I swear.” Alex muttered as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “You’re lucky I love you.”  
Lena’s amusement gave way to her curiosity. “What are you both doing here exactly?”  
Alex straightened up until she was standing at full height and rested her hand securely on her sister’s forearm. “Kara, remember the conversation on your couch...when I worried that I had disappointed you for being gay?”  
Kara nodded as she watched her sister with concern. “Yeah, but Alex...you will never disappoint me.”  
“And I appreciate that. But Do you remember the end of the conversation, when you asked about the girl and you let me gush about Maggie and then you told me I was beautiful and then you had to leave to get the escaped alien but told me to go get the girl?”  
Lena listened in admiration as the sisters interacted with each other. A large part of her envied their relationship, the easy affection and brutal loyalty toward each other. But the other part of her was just happy that these two amazing people actually cared about her almost as much as they cared about each other.  
Kara smiled at Alex. “Of course, I remember.” Her smiled faded. “It didn’t go so well for you though.”  
“That night.” Alex squeezed Kara’s forearm. “But I did get the girl in the end.”  
Kara glanced at Lena who was watching her with adoration and...love.  
“I love you Kara, I do. And I will sit endlessly and listen to you gush about your crush for as long as you want to talk about her.” Alex made sure to glare at Lena in a way to assure the girl she was talking about her. “But at some point, you’re gonna have to stop talking about it and actually go get your girl.”  
Kara’s eyes widened and her mouth dropped open as her whole face flushed. Alex smirked at the sight, then turned toward Lena. “And you! You’re a freaking Luthor, so woman the hell up and tell this oblivious idiot that you’re in love with her.”  
Lena, to her credit, maintained a bit more dignity than Kara did. But not enough to hide some of the mortification she felt.  
Alex shook her head in amusement, then started walking through the office and toward the door. “Where are you going?” Kara asked as Alex reached for the handle.  
“Some of us can’t fly, so I’m going to walk downstairs and wait for my girlfriend to give me a ride home. It appears that our movie night has been effectively canceled, sis.”  
She closed the door behind herself and let the lovesick idiots fend for themselves.  
Lena turned toward Kara. “So, you like me?”  
Kara nodded. “Of all the worlds in the universe and the fact that there are multiple Earths, I somehow landed on this one. And maybe it’s fate or something, but of all the people in the entire vastness of the universe, I found you.”  
She moved until she was standing directly in front of Lena, she could hear the other woman’s heart pounding erratically in her chest and it made her own speed up to a rhythm that matched it.  
“You actually seemed to prefer Kara to Supergirl, but then I learned that you knew all along and that you knew what I could never properly explain. That they are both me, I need both to feel whole. You understand me and see me and make me want to be the person that the whole world already seems to believe I am. Even though, so many odds were against us, and destiny seemed to have wanted us to be enemies...we could never have been. Because you are you, and you are beautiful and kind and thoughtful and intelligent and so beyond amazing that I am such a bumbling idiot when I’m around you.”  
“You’re doing pretty good for yourself right now.” Lena admitted shyly as she fought the urge to close the gap and kiss her.  
“It was usually easier as Supergirl because you were more distant around her at first, more professional.” She looked at Lena’s lips and her eyes widened when Lena bit her own bottom lip seductively. “You were flirting with me all those times! I would tell Alex that I thought you were, but she didn’t believe me...at first. Wow, am I blind.”  
“For someone with x-ray vision, you do seem to fail to see what’s right in front of you.” She took Kara’s hand in her own and interlaced their fingers. “I’m scared this is just a dream and when I wake up…”  
Kara closed the distance and kissed her. It was soft and sweet and over much too quickly. “If it’s a dream, I don’t want to wake up either.”  
Lena kissed her again, and held her impossibly closer. When they stopped kissing, they both remained wrapped up in each other. Kara weaved her hands through Lena’s dark tresses. “So…” Kara bit her lip nervously. “Why do you love me?”  
“You brought light into my perpetually dark world. But for all your goodness and bright, you were still able to see me. You didn’t shy away, you didn’t want to change me. You believed in who I already was and that made me a better person. I wanted to be good enough for you, but you made me realize that you already thought I was good enough...that I didn’t have to always try so hard...that I could just be. I could crumble and cry, I could take charge of my own destiny and save the day, or I could share a simple coffee with a friend and just laugh about nonsense. I’ve never let myself want something as much as I find myself wanting you.”  
Kara smiled at that and kissed her once more, or it was supposed to be once more until Lena pushed her toward the couch and turned the simple kiss into a heated makeout session. When Kara collapsed into the couch, Lena stood in front of her.  
“I am willing to wait for as long as you need me to, I just need you to know that I want this more than you could ever imagine.” She smirked darkly. “I thought with how oblivious you tend to be, I would have to start using a more direct approach.”  
Kara rolled her eyes and tugged Lena unto her lap. “Shut up and kiss me, Miss Luthor.”  
Lena’s eyes darkened immensely at that. Just before she gave in to the demand, she whispered huskily in Kara’s ear. “Many of my recent fantasies have started with that very sentence.”  
Then she closed the distance between them and swallowed Kara’s moan with a sensual kiss.


End file.
